Battle of the sexes has morphed into gender confusion. Can we say she? Or is it he? Or is that incorrect? How are we to address each other?
In a world that seems to have gone crazy, we have added one more confusion; is he running on the girls track team? When at times we look at some people, we shake our head and ask, is that a boy or is it a girl? That person dresses like a girl, fingernail polish, mascara, blouse, but she sounds like a guy?
It is no wonder our society seems confused. Ever since the commercial where the women says she can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan and never let you forget that she is a WOMAN, our society has been loosing its way.
What is a man? Some people like to say that being a man is everything opposite to being a woman. Some of the lists can get detailed and long. But I always enjoy hearing my Pastor's wife describe how men are because everything she describes is nothing like I am. Men would rather work alone, women like to work on committees. I prefer committees. Men have 10 words to say, women 10,000 words. My family believes Dad talks more than Mom. Men are planned, women are spontaneous. Not for me, I love to go somewhere at the drop of a hat but I have to get on my wife's schedule to spend time with her, (she is that busy). Men are logical and women are emotional. Are you kidding? I cry at every chick flick there is. My wife just smiles when she is watching an emotional movie when she looks at me, knowing I am crying way before her.
Some like to say Men are aggressive, assertive, they know what they want and they go for it. While others say that is just a description of New Yorkers. :)
You can see this can be a very confusing topic for people. If women are motherly, when a child falls down on the playground and your a women who doesn't just want to run over and grab the child and hug them. What does that say about you? Your not a woman?
All of this confusion comes from a misunderstanding about how we are created. We were not created as men and women!
All of these descriptions are society's way of trying to define something totally apart from the designer who actually created us. We were made male and female. That is it. We have biological differences and how we work out those differences are as different as there are people. Opposites attract. My wife is logical, I am very creative. That is not to say she has no creativity, of course she does. I can balance a check book but I hate it.
We need to stop trying to be more of a "man" or more of a "women."
We need to actually be working on the traits that have nothing to do with being a man or a woman that will actually make us better people no matter if I am emotional and my wife less so.
Work on being patient. No matter which of you is more "aggressive," take a moment and work on patients. Do not acting unbecomingly in trying to get your way. Be kind, what does that look like? Define kindness, it is an abstract. For my wife and I, it means that when I am really trying to explain something I really care about, I have to lower my voice and speak slower. In my family, when we really felt something was important, we got louder and more animated which was not received as kindness by my wife.
Learn to be trust worthy so that jealousy can not even enter the conversation. Learn to forgive in such a manner that you don't keep a record of an offense but at the same time don't assume trust is an automatic once an offense has occurred. Don't be happy when others mess up, have empathy.
If every person whether male or female worked on having empathy for others to the level that if your friend died and everyone you knew was crying but you knew that you could raise him from the dead (you could fix the problem) and you did not raise him from the dead until you let their emotions affect you so much that you actually wept with them before you "fixed the problem"; wouldn't others in your life really feel love from you when their hurt so touched you that you actually felt what they felt? That would stop a lot of people from feeling unloved by you whether you are the non-emotional male or the non-emotional female.
What if you did not brag but actually was humble enough to recognize that you created nothing about yourself?
You did not create your intelligence, your eye color, your height, the color of your skin, your hair properties, thin, thick, wavy straight, etc. We can work to improve what we have but I will never be an Einstein in math. I would rather paint a picture and I did not design that in myself either.
It is important to know when you should turn the tables over and not allow people to walk on you while they are doing wrong. But at other times, when someone has done something wrong and everyone else wants to stone them, you might realize grace is needed and you don't condemn them but just softly remind them to go and don't do it again.
All of this is important for a society to function. Don't let them confuse you, he is male, she is female and it is easy to tell the difference, take a shower and you will be able to see the difference.
There are males and there are females, period. Everything else is just feeble attempts at understanding that we are different. VIVA the difference!
All the stereo types of men and women do not define us correctly. It would be better if we could help others to find their opposites and ask their creator to help them become like the creator, who is perfect in the balance between judgement and mercy. Perfect in balance between patience and assertiveness. Perfect in all ways. Ask the creator of the universe and you will get the help. Jesus was sent to show us what God is like.
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